At home

So I cancelled a work appointment today after an awful nights sleep and a jittery weekend.  I called the doctor to make an appointment and am planning on talking to my manager about  temporarily cutting down on my work hours. And I’m looking for a cleaning lady to pitch in at home. Hopefully these actions will result in some more peace of mind and body. I’m afraid there’s a limit to how much stress I can take, as much as I hate to admit it.I hate being weak, and have the strong feeling that things will fall apart without me. That counts for home and work. Too large a sense of responsibility perhaps?

I had to go to the dentist this morning, who proceeded to torture me while giving me a new filling.  After twenty odd years of nary having a thing wrong with my teeth it was not a fun experience, and totally draining on the energy. Came home and decided to watch a soothing movie, Miss Potter. It really was soothing, and some lovely escapism.

Made two lists. One of things I should be doing to feel better and one of things that need to be done which are nagging in the back of my head. The two are in conflict, at least to some extent. Take this afternoon for example. I could/should go for a bike ride or a walk because physical activitity is good for the mind and body. But there’s a number of things on my other list which would be a relief to get done but which feel like eating an elephant. Not sure which to do yet.

Here’s my list of  “good things to do”.

– stand and sit up straight. I’ve been slouching so much it hurts to straighten myself.
– think positive thoughts. DUUUHHHH
– eat healthier. Stuffing myself full of sugar and gaining weight are not conducive to positive mental and physical health
– get more body movement. Either biking or walking will do.

The brilliance of these things is unbelievable, is it not?

Sorry, sarcasm coming through. There goes my resolution to think positive thoughts!!


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